When Serving is Hard

I actually have had a handful of difficult patients in my short nursing career and studies. Patients who are angry or upset or ungrateful, but last night I had a patient that beat them all. He was down right aggressive in addition to agitated and argumentative. I always try to go into a patient's room with an open mind despite what I receive in report. This is actually one of my strengths.
I had a patient that did not sound so delightful in report, so I brought in this man's pain medication to try to start off on his good side when I went in to do his assessment. But I quickly discovered that there seemed to be no "good side" of this man. He immediately started accusing me of not giving him his evening medications. Ok, so what medication do you normally take in the evening? (In my sweet, understanding voice)...And he continued to go around in circles about how we weren't giving him the right medications at the right time because he "had been taking these medications for 10 years this way." Sure, I understand that maybe the medications aren't right, so I tried to ask him questions to try to figure out what changes needed to be made to his medication. My investigation and questions not only went nowhere because he didn't actually listen, but he downright started yelling at me and slammed his fist on the computer screen when I was trying to show him what medications he was currently receiving and when.
I totally get it. Being in a hospital and being sick is stressful. I have had many patients that I have been able to work with in at least getting them to cooperate or understand treatment and work through what they're feeling....but this guy was a brick wall. I was getting nowhere in a hurry and only felt more anxious in the room as his agitation escalated.
Now, with all that said about his inappropriate and unreasonable behavior, let me tell you that this man is homeless. He has a touch screen cell phone and does receive his medications somehow though.
Working with a man like this is a struggle to me. Honestly, I was starting to boil inside wanting to tell him what I really thought about his behavior and downright meanness when I sincerely came in that room wanting to help him. Its people like him that honestly are hard to love and hard to serve.
I have an even greater openness when working with homeless patients: why are they homeless? they may have been through a lot in their life; they may have a mental illness contributing to being homeless. I can often justify why people act the way they do, which might help me love them a little bit more but in a shallow way, but I need to just love. I don't need to justify people's choices to make it easier on me to love them. I just need to love them. The end. When its hard, I need to ask the Holy Spirit to give me His love. When its easy I need to ask the Holy Spirit to give me His love. Christ calls us to LOVE EVERYONE. Including the ungrateful. Including the perpetually negative. Including the people who act entitled. This is an old lesson that God is continually working in my heart.  To love people where they are.