Tearful Mother's Day

This mother's day was unique in that I was actually reminded of a bigger picture. Not that I'm a mother, so this day isn't about me anyway, but I was given the opportunity to step back and think larger than flowers and a card.
Sarah Price sang at church, which I have learned means that I need to grab some tissues on my way to my seat, because she shares the same passion for the poor and broken of impoverished nations. Mother's day was no different. The church service actually opened with a video about the tough jobs that mothers have: doing laundry, chauffeuring their children every direction, cooking meals, helping with homework, and the list goes on. It is not only a 24-hour job, it is a crazy difficult job. Our pastors integrated this video to remind everyone of how difficult the job of being mother really is.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HB3xM93rXbY
This video is cute and a great reminder that if motherhood was broken down into a job description that no one would probably apply for the job because of how hard it sounds.
Then Sarah shared and sang. She sang Tenth Avenue North's "Worn." I have heard this song many times, even live, but the context that she put the song in made me cry. Sarah showed a picture of, and described, a 13 year old girl from Guatemala who didn't choose to be a mother. She had no say. And yet she was thrown into this incredibly difficult job. Sarah also described the mother of a war-stricken country who fears for her childrens' very lives. Or the mother who holds her lifeless child because she didn't have enough food to feed them. She described the angst that a mother must have who doesn't have medical care for her sick child. Then she sang this song as a cry from their worn hearts...
"I'm tired. I'm worn. My heart is heavy from the work it takes to keep on breathing.
I've made mistakes. I've let my hope fail. My soul feels crushed by the weight of this world. And I know that You can give me rest. So I cry out with all that I have left.

Let me see redemption win. Let me know the struggle ends. That you can mend a heart that's frail and torn.
I want to know a song can rise from the ashes of a broken life and all that's dead inside can be reborn
cause I'm worn.

I know I need to lift up my eyes up. But I'm too weak. Life just won't let up. And I know that you can give me rest. So I cry out with all that I have left.

And my prayers are wearing thin. I'm worn even before the day begins. I'm warn I've lost my will to fight. I'm worn so heaven come and flood my eyes.
I want to know a song can rise from the ashes of a broken life and all that's dead inside can be reborn. Yes all that's dead inside will be reborn. Though I'm worn."

I cried throughout the song. What a different perspective. How puny are my burdens compared to a mother who holds her dead child or cannot protect them from war? My life and American-motherhood can be so cushy. Please don't misunderstand me, I know that mothers loose their children here in America and that they feel the same incredible hurt. I have friends who have experienced that loss and I cried for the pain that I honestly cannot even imagine. The anguish is equal no matter what their address is. But I try to wrap my mind around the different world that mothers in Asia, Africa, and South America live in and its mind boggling. To be subject to such vulnerability and helplessness as a mother. To feel defeated before the day even begins because there is no physical escape from their circumstance.

So while I did celebrate my mother through a card and gifts on this mother's day, I also sat beside my mom and we cried together during Sarah's song.
To remember the broken and truly weary and worn.
To listen to their hearts' cry through this song.
And then to pray and to not walk away untouched.

THAT is what I am most thankful for about my mother, Emilee Draper. She has not walked away from her time in India, the books she has read, the documentaries she has watched, or the testimonies that she has heard. She is drawn to give and to go. She needs to go because once you taste that kind of brokenness I believe that the Holy Spirit inside a Christian tugs at you to help and to love. That is why when I told my mom that I sponsored a little girl from India through Gospel for Asia's Bridge of Hope, she cried. She is moved by the need that she cannot ignore. That is what my mom has, and is, teaching me.